If you struggle finding boundaries between work and home life, maybe this is the season to sit down with your family and talk about what changes you need to make.
It's a bit strange to think that the latter belongs on the same list as the first three sins listed. Rarely do we think of busyness as an action worthy of comparison to the Ten Commandments. But it may be necessary to think of it that way.
In the world of church production our level of busyness can become a calling card or a symbolic Red Badge of Courage. Who does the most Christmas services, or who has the most events in a week, or who stayed up the latest and got up the earliest…it can become not only an unhealthy way of comparison, but a dangerous way of life.
Most of us who serve in this arena are wired similarly. We are driven. We possess a strong work ethic, willing to spend whatever hours are necessary to get the job done. Being obsessive or perfectionist is normal, and it's commonplace to work long hours in the name of ministry.
It's easy to feel like the sacrifice is worth it. After all, the long hours at work and away from friends and family are for a good cause—we're helping a ministry grow so that more people can experience the presence of God. That's a good thing, right?
On the surface, yes. But the Bible shows us otherwise.
In the book of Luke (chapter 10, verses 38-42), the author tells the story of when Jesus visited the home of his friends Mary and Martha. Mary quickly threw herself at the feet of Jesus, ready to draw near to Him and learn. Martha, who would have probably been a great production leader, was too busy for that. There was work to be done and preparations to be made, and she couldn't afford to stop and rest. Things weren't ready, and she needed to carry the weight of making sure that the environment was perfect for ministry.
A quick rebuke comes to Martha. Quit worrying so much about the “things” of life, the Master said. Sometimes it's better to just slow down and rest in His presence.
Again, on the surface, it all makes sense. And I think we would all agree that it's necessary sometimes to slow down. Life isn't about work, even if it's in the ministry. After all, we should be serving (working) out of the overflow, and if we aren't taking the time to rest and grow ourselves, there is likely very little left to pour back into our ministry.
The wakeup call for me came recently while reading the book Second in Command by Chris Jackson and Dutch Sheets. In the book, Jackson addressed Martha's story from Luke, but did so in a way that I'd never considered before.
Jackson points out the fact that the story of Mary and Martha is placed in the book of Luke as a bridge of sorts, providing the gap between the parable of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37) and Jesus' teaching on the Lord's Prayer (11:1-4). Understanding the principles of Martha is the key to understanding the connection between the selflessness and servanthood of the Good Samaritan and the value of a healthy prayer life. Martha was so busy working on her ability to serve others that she overlooked the importance of withdrawing from the busyness of life to just spend time with her Lord.
How often do we make the same mistake?
In church tech ministry, our job is to work so that others can better experience the Lord's presence. But if you're anything like me, it becomes easy to gloss over the importance of feeding myself. Yet Jesus repeatedly showed us through his ministry of the importance of withdrawing from the busyness, getting away from the hustle, finding a quiet place, and spending intimate time with God.
Failing to heed this simple principle has the potential of leading to disastrous consequences.
If we neglect to place boundaries between work and family life, we can unintentionally lead our families to resent our ministry (or God) because of our work ethic. Our desire to serve the church becomes more important than our desire to be the spiritual leaders of our own home. It's easy for me to want to spend hours learning more about how to do my job better, through podcasts, blogs, and manuals. But am I spending the same amount of time trying to learn how to be a better spouse or parent, and am I investing the same amount of energy into my loved ones?
When we stay busy, our discernment starts to slip. And that's just how Satan wants it to be. As Jackson points out, “Satan can't stop a woman like Martha, so he gets her to do more. He probably can't quench your leadership drive, so he'll get behind you and push you . . . He's just as happy with burnout as he is adultery. If he can't get you to renounce God, he'll just get you to burn out in the service of God.”
Wow. Ouch.
Such incredibly true and powerful words. And how often do we see burnout run rampant through the church tech world? I'm sure all of us have experienced it to some extent, whether in our own lives or in the lives of someone close to us.
So much time spent working in ministry. Having to walk away because families were wrecked, or judgment slipped and bad decisions were made, or simply because the work wasn't answered with a needed amount of appreciation, so hearts turned hard from bitterness and resentment.
For most in the ministry world, the first quarter of the year is a time of transition. We are shifting away from the craziness of Christmas, regaining our bearings, and starting to slowly spin back towards the cycle of Easter preparation and execution. And the benefit of a new year means that we can all get off to a new start personally, not just professionally.
If you struggle finding boundaries between work and home life, maybe this is the season to sit down with your family and talk about what changes you need to make. If you feel constantly pushed and pressed at work, engage with a supervisor to see how they can help you manage your schedule differently. If you find your attitude, judgment, or discernment slipping because you're too exhausted to fight (and win) those spiritual battles every day, find a friend or mentor that can provide the accountability and encouragement to help you stand strong.
Withdraw. Rest. Invest time with family and friends. Commit to prayer and worship.
Choose what is better, as Mary did. Don't let your busyness keep you from all that the Lord has to offer.
