I think the ideal church tech leader is about 25 years old and either unmarried or only recently married. This person is ideal because the schedule of the average church tech is “varied,” at best. Lots of late nights that often bookend early mornings. Some weeks you’re working 70 hours, other weeks you’re working 30. It’s especially hard around traditional holidays like Christmas and Easter because when most believers are spending time with their families, church techs are usually putting in the most hours of their year. If you have kids, the schedule complicates your life exponentially, which is often misunderstood by a church tech’s leadership who carry unrealistic expectations. The church tech is then pulled one way by the needs of their family and the other way by the demands of their superiors.
So, how do you lead a church production team when you have a family?
I have four kids, ages 12 all the way down to 21 months, and I’ve been doing this for a decade, so let me share some things that have worked for me.
First, lean into your team.
Any business leader worth their salt will tell you that delegation is key to leading a successful business. This is all the more important in church work, which is usually and chronically understaffed. You cannot do everything on your own, and there are probably a couple of people on your volunteer roster who want to do more, so let them do it. If they don’t know how to do it, train them according to the 70% rule, that if they can do it 70% as well as you can, let them do it.
And you may need to get a little creative about this with your executive pastor. Here at LifeMission, we actually offer contract pay for working production at certain events like weddings, funerals, and miscellaneous gatherings we host. You’d be surprised how many of your volunteers will say yes to a couple of hours on a Friday night or Saturday morning for $100, especially your younger team members. Contracting opens up a lot of options for covering all the little events that eat up their nights and weekends.
Also, don’t be afraid to teach people how to turn on the sound system and show something simple on Propresenter. Most of those little time-eating events just need a mic and background image or two, and just about anyone can learn how to make that happen. Last year, I created a laminated checklist with a step-by-step process for starting and shutting down our main worship center so that I could train other ministry leaders to basically run their own tech. We can operate our Digico with an iPad, our lighting system with an iPad, and ProPresenter with an iPad, so I invested in some refurbished iPad Pros and sturdy cases for them. This gives our diversified production system the flexibility to be run by one person during smaller events, or even no one if a ministry just needs a set-and-forget lighting cue, a host microphone, and some house music.
Second, have a conversation with leadership.
Honestly, they might not even know you’re having a hard time; they certainly can’t if you don’t tell them. If you have good leaders, you should be in consistent one-on-one meetings where they’re checking in with you, but not everyone leads that way. Whatever the case, you need to have a sit-down and tell them you need to rethink your working hours so that you can be a good husband and father or wife and mother.
Here’s the deal—your family is your first calling. Your children will primarily learn about the kind attention of the Father, the care of the Spirit, and the nearness of Jesus through you. You can’t be that example to them if you’re not around. You are also one of the primary means that God relates his care, wisdom, and counsel to your spouse, and you can’t be that presence to them if you’re not around. And when you’re on your deathbed, you won’t care about how sick that Easter service was; you’ll want to love and be loved by your spouse and kids.
If this conversation with leadership doesn’t go well, it may be time to find employment elsewhere. Give them as much grace as you can, but know that the Lord is for your family and he will provide regardless of where you work.
Third, get your kids involved.
I lead church production because my dad was a pastor and songwriter who let me play around with audio consoles and video equipment. One of the deepest joys in my life was getting to minister alongside my dad during junior high and high school; as much as I can, I welcome my kids into what I’m doing now. Just the other week, I put the easy rig on my 7-year-old and helped him take shots during our 11 am service. He had a blast. I let my kids run light cues sometimes and I try to teach them about how things work when I have them with me during service prep. I let them put on a headset and listen to the coms. I bring them to our prayer room when I’m leading sets. They love it.
This requires a flexible spirit. We church production people love our systems and processes, but our kids are more important. Obviously, don’t jeopardize a smooth production, but where you can be flexible, insert your children. Let them work alongside you.
Finally, be ok with getting interrupted
You’re going to get interrupted at work by your family; that’s ok. You’re going to get a call at home from time to time because something broke at work; that’s ok. This is also where that flexible spirit comes in—don’t get mad or discouraged, just handle the situation with grace and kindness. My people at work know that I’m almost always going to answer a text or call from my wife. My wife knows that I’m going to limit interruptions at home, but sometimes they’re unavoidable. My family, my leadership, and I have set our expectations accordingly, and everything runs pretty smooth.
This is a hard job; make the best you can of it.
Redeem it into something your kids will remember with kindness, something that your spouse will remember was less important than them. It’s an opportunity to show them love, so love them well.
